Sometimes I feel like it is impossible to pray stress away.
Other days, a simple prayer makes me feel like everything is going to be okay.
Lately, I have been letting the stress pile up on me, to the point where I almost feel like I am going to drown. Prayer has taken a backseat to driving my children around, trying to keep up on the housework, and teaching my students. Social media has even created stress with friends and family taking sides over both important and trivial issues.
I need to take a step back, and replant myself in my faith. I need to PRAY, and reestablish roots in His plans for my life.
My plans, however well laid out, do not matter. Yet, I still feel stressed out when my plans do not play out as I had hoped.
Since I have last written, one of my sons has been diagnosed with a severe nut allergy. My other son has been diagnosed with Tourette's Syndrome. I felt like I was losing my mind, and my grip on reality. I mourned the healthy family I thought I had. God sent me reminders that it could be much, much worse. Still, I focused on the challenges that come with those diagnoses, instead of the opportunities they can become to be a better mother to my children.
I love both of my boys, and their crazy traits that require me to be a better mom.
Tourette's is a daily challenge for the whole family. My son who lives with it in his brain is so smart, cute and funny. He works harder than any of us to try and keep himself under control. Lord, I pray that we can come together as a family to help him embrace this nuance, and create a better life for him through it.
The nut allergy proves to be an interesting aspect of life for my middle child. He is the most responsible, easy going kid, that sometimes I forget he has this challenge. He reads labels on his own, and at almost ten-years-old, is more aware of what he eats than I am! He is always so overly cautious, that sometimes I worry he will miss out on things. I have to pray to remind myself that it is okay for him to miss out, but that he needs to feel special too.
Lord, I pray for all mothers, each of whom is dealing with their own special issues in this life with their children. I pray that you will open our eyes and ears to see and hear the GOOD that comes from our challenges, especially where we tend to focus on trying to control what is in your hands. Lord, please bless our children, through us, and our struggles with feeling like good mothers. We are good, because of You. We are enough, because You made us. Amen